Essay Structure/ Suggesting Revisions Question Preview (ID: 59522)


A Brief Review Of Revising Strategies And Essay Structure. TEACHERS: click here for quick copy question ID numbers.

What needs fixed? Everyone agree that recess is important for children in elementary school, but what about middle school students? I believe that students in middle school needs time to relax and have fun during the school day. A period of free time
a) eliminate sentence fragments
b) fix subject-verb agreement errors
c) add missing commas
d) use more specific language

What needs fixed? Our school needs to serve better food for lunch. Our lunches should be delicious. Our lunches should be nutritious. Our lunches should be satisfying. One way to achieve this would be to have a salad bar available. Salad bars can con
a) Combine sentences containing related information
b) use shorter sentences
c) use longer sentences
d) nothing needs fixed..it's perfect!

What needs fixed? I saw a movie called Blob Invasion. It was really good. It was about a weird guy who was into science. He worked on bugs and small animals. He made a machine that did things to the bugs and the animals. They became big weird things.
a) use more specific language
b) reduce repetitive language
c) eliminate fragments
d) subject-verb agreement

Which one is the thesis? Pick the best one!
a) The paragraphs that follow will discuss information about using public transportation to go to and from work in citie
b) I will be talking about why year-round school is not a good idea.
c) Public transportation’s many delays, mechanical failures, and overcrowding make it a bad option for most people.
d) Why was Sandra Day O’Connor one of the most influential judges on the Supreme Court in the 20th century?

Which one is a thesis? Pick the best one!
a) People should eat more vegetables because they lower the risk of heart disease, increase life expectancy, and help to build s
b) How should we incorporate exercise and nutrition when considering ways to improve our health
c) This essay examines the the effect of employment on high school students.
d) I think that living in a community is fun.

Read this sentence: Every year at the school carnival, Cho Chang sets up and to sit in the dunk tank. Choose the version below that uses parallel construction correctly.
a) Every year at the school carnival, Cho Chang sets up and sitting in the dunk tank.
b) Every year at the school carnival, Cho Chang sets up and sat in the dunk tank.
c) Every year at the school carnival, Cho Chang sets up and sits in the dunk tank.
d) It is correct the way it is written- no changes necessary

Read this sentence: Once Rafiki finishes the time machine, his adventures will be exciting, of interest, and eye-opening. Which version best uses parallel construction correctly?
a) Once Rafiki finishes the time machine, his adventures will be exciting, make him interested, and eye-opening
b) Once Rafiki finishes the time machine, his adventures will be exciting, interesting, and eye-opening
c) Once Rafiki finishes the time machine, his adventures will be exciting, to be of interest, and eye-opening.
d) No changes- it is perfect the way it is written

Which one is a strong claim?
a) his essay will discuss how the US government funds arts programs in public schools
b) The rule of the Roman Empire ended over 1,500 years ago.
c) Requiring cyclists to wear helmets would decrease the number of serious injuries from bike accidents
d) In Jonas's community, children are given jobs at age twelve.

Which one is a strong claim?
a) In 2013, about 1.7 million students were homeschooled in the US.
b) I will now discuss the history of women in the US Army
c) All high schools should teach students how to manage and invest money because it will make them more successful adults.
d) Once a British colony, the United States became independent in 1776.

What needs fixed? Electric eels are some of the most hideous creatures on the planet. They have flattened heads and long, disgusting, tube-shaped bodies. Though they look like eels, which are also revolting, electric eels aren't true eels; they're mo
a) include more sensory details
b) eliminate overly biased language
c) get rid of comma splices/ run-ons
d) nothing needs fixed...it's perfect!

A thesis should..
a) not include the use of I
b) clearly show the writer's opinion
c) give reasons for the writer's opinion
d) all of this and maybe more

The body paragraphs in an essay should..
a) contain a claim that connects to the thesis
b) include evidence or support for the claim
c) include an explanation of how the evidence supports the claim
d) all of this and maybe more

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